The Dinglehopper Situation

[xp_phoenix]

I seem to have discovered a massive cache of forks, spoons, a wine opener, and someone's eyelash curler in my purse this morning.

Please let me know who the wine opener and eyelash curler is so I can return them. My apologies.

Comments

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

I know, right? But you can keep the curlers, if you'd like. Try to make yours as luxurious.

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

Aww you shouldn't have. I'll cherish it always.

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

See that you do. Cause maybe I was born with it. Or maybe it's Maybelline. Or maybe it's something completely different.

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

Like a secondary mutation to spontaneously grow immaculate eyelashes?

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

You're the doctor, you'd know these things. I am but the lowly owner of said immaculate eyelashes.

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

You said it maybe completely different. What would your theory be?

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

A mysterious someone with an eyelash improver ray gun rayed me and suddenly POOF, my eyelashes were amazing.

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

And why would they do that?

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

It's part of the mysterious someone's diabolical plan to take over the world by making everyone's eyelashes so heavy that they can't keep their eyes open anymore and then this mysterious person will take over the world. Obviously.

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

Of course. How did I not see it before?

But your eyes are open still. How can you type?

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

I can type with my eyes closed, doctor lady. It's a skill.

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

I'll give you that. But being able to read what I write?

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

Voice to text. I stole the program from Matt.

[x-jeangrey.livejournal.com]

Mmmhmm.

[x-deadpool.livejournal.com]

I know, right? I'm so smart - with me on the side of good, we'll manage to foil that mysterious someone's dastardly plans.